I see turnarounds. People transform before my eyes. That’s my profession, and I am absolutely blessed to have it. Clients ask me how I create turnarounds, and I have had very few answers. Coaching is one of those near effortless things for me, and it is our natural talents that are often so hard to dissect.
I was tired of not having the answers, however, so I have embarked on the arduous journey of picking apart something that is so natural to me. This piece is about my first finding on that journey.
I am in the frighteningly small minority of people who have a clear, thoughtful, articulated, and powerful “why.” I have experienced its sheer power, and because of that, it’s where I start with most clients. Having them establish this powerful “why” is the grease that oils the machine of coaching—and ultimately of clients’ achievement. It is the thing, for example, that enables me to pick up the phone to call executives of multi-billion dollar companies without a thought. And it is the single most important thing. It is that mighty a force. At the risk of sarcasm, why?
Because with a powerful “why” as your onboard compass, you make the spontaneous right decisions every day.
I have seen clients within weeks of coming to me conflicted, confounded, and confused:
- Walk into their boss’ office, make a clear, articulate statement of their worth, and double their salaries.
- Courageously step away from a job that no longer served them in an effort to pursue more meaningful work.
- Kick strong unproductive habits to create more fulfilling personal and professional relationships.
And they so often tell me how surprisingly easier and natural it seems after we have gotten to “why.” That is because they are on the spontaneous right path to the right destination. You can’t know it until you experience it, and my immediate mission with clients is to start moving them toward that magical place. Without the help of a professional, it may take you a bit longer, but here is how you can do it yourself. Keep in mind that my powerful “why” is to “Have a positive impact on at least one person and one animal every day.”
- Make a list of people who have done at least one thing that truly moved you and the thing(s) that they did? When I worked through this, I came up with two categories of individuals. There was a cross-section of life/business coaches and psychologist like Marshall Goldsmith, Martha Beck, and Daniel Goleman. There were also groups involved with animal welfare like Best Friends Animal Society and PAWS. My instincts also drove me to put down movie characters that moved me, and this helped greatly.
- What do they have in common? There may be more than one category of things that these people and their actions have in common, but be specific. In my case, there were helpers of humans and those of animals, but what they had in common was helping.
- Devise this commonality into a powerful one-sentence “why” for living (ensuring it has the words “every day” in it), write it down 100 times over 100 days, and carry your card around everywhere you go. Buy small index cards. They usually come in a pack of 100. Before you go to bed every night, take out a new card and rewrite your powerful “why.” Put each new card in your pocket or a place in your purse where you’ll see it often throughout the day.
If you need to consult the volumes of scientific research about why writing visions and powerful “whys” repeatedly and carrying them with you will ingrain them in your subconscious over time, by all means, Google away. Or you could take one minute each night to see yourself spontaneously investing the right amount of energy in the right actions to get you to the right place within 100 days. Count on it.
This article originally appeared on Psychology Today Nov 18, 2015
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